Abandoning the past

Martin, I agree wholeheartedly with you. I am thankful that my readings of history and literature are not subject to the whims of a professor who may not have a more valid grasp of the topic that I, and that I am not subject to his critical eye for the sake of a favorable grade in order to graduate magna cum laude.

I looked at photos from a dear friend's Facebook album chronicling the beginning of her senior year and I felt a twinge of pain. But I forced myself to look at those emotions that triggered that response, and realized the complexity of those feelings. I wished I was with those people, enjoying good, unique times. Yet the physical places that they were I wished to have no part of. I wanted to be doing crazy, out of control things with them, but miles away from my old college, where they were. That exemplifies the complexity of post-grad feeling: one wishes to continue the relationships of the past, yet one realizes that such relationships must transcend a given place and time. But which friendships are built on context and which extend beyond it? That is the challenge that we face, and not all survive that test.

I try to connect with people I was so very close with three months ago, Martin. Some of them I do make a genuine connection with, and the others seem fake, a continuation of conditions long expired. I hope and pray that I will be able to break free of that tyrannical grip that context holds over us and reconnect with those I have neglected over the past few months.